Thursday, May 9, 2013

Random Notes...'til the Break of Dawn

3:08 am
No writing inspiration at this moment. Breathalizer at 5. I'm going to take a shower and see if something hits me.

3:38 am
I am now clean, awake and refreshed. I feel like a new man...a new man who, like the old man, has no fucking ideas to write about.

I got nothin'.

4:02 am
Time for a cup of hot tea. Golden Oolong Tea. Oolong is a traditional Chinese tea...but I bought it because of the packaging...and it sounded fancy...and it was on sale. You stay classy, HEB.

4:18 am
You shouldn't microwave your cup of water with the tea bag in it if the string coming from the bag is attached to the paper label by a small staple. I nearly burned down the goddamn sober house just now. I'd then be known as the Tea Bag Arsonist in the media, and I'd be contacted by all sorts of perverts for the rest of my life.

4:22 am
Why yes... I do giggle every time I type "tea bag". I'm only human.

4:51 am
Browsing Craigslist jobs, because you never know, right? One listing for dishwashers had these lines in it:

-- You must be presentable in appearance
-- Dishwashers with car preferred
-- Bi-lingual or English preferred
-- Must be able to pass a background check. No felons please.
-- Please email resume

Now, I personally am trying to avoid making assumptions. Maybe there really is a well-dressed, clean cut, English speaking individual without a felony who will e-mail a resume to this employer when applying for a dishwashing position. It's a possibility, right?

I, however, gave up on the ad at "presentable in appearance", which was the first sentence. I thought, fuck off...and then I read "No felons", which was the ad telling me, "No, YOU fuck off." Well played, Craigslist Ad.

There is a phone number in the ad as well. I'm tempted to call up and ask, "Yes, I'm interested in applying for one of your dishwasher positions. Should I send a cover letter with my resume?"

5:00 am
Breathalizer. I can now go to sleep, but I probably won't.

5:06 am
My roommate, Bob, is up. He has a new job, so he wakes up at 5 am...just as I go to sleep. We're essentially time-sharing the room.

He's not from here. "What in God's name is going on with that upper deck lower deck thing on I-35?" Congrats,'re one step closer to rejoining society by sharing in the loathing of the I-35 commute. Mazel tov.

Bob: "Why would anyone build the highway like that?"
Me: "Because it, like communism, was a great idea in theory. It, like communism, would have worked if it weren't for the existence of human nature."

5:19 am
Currently listening to Nocturne in E flat Major, Op. 9 No. 2.

You know...Frederic Fucking Chopin?

5:45 am
Just spent half an hour at the Berrics' website. Time for a cigarette and bed. I have to work 11 hours. Gotta hurry before that damned sun comes up.